Nine minutes.

It only took me 9 minutes to remove my ex-fiance’s handiwork from my bedroom mirror.

9 minutes to remove what I’ve seen nearly every single day for (give or take) 4,380 days.

540 seconds to remove something that I truly believed I couldn’t escape from; something that I told people that I didn’t even see since it had been there for my entire adult life.

Our relationship ended nearly 2 years ago. It ended with shattered glass and flashing lights. It ended so abruptly that we didn’t even understand the finality of it. He would reach out to me and I would look at myself in the mirror, see the words and instantly feel like I owed him something.

I believed that if you loved someone, no matter how toxic they were for you, no matter how deeply they broke you, you had to be there for them; you had to give them a chance.

I believed love was about taking risks; putting it all on the line and hoping for the best. I believed love meant sacrificing your spirit to make your partner happy. I believed love happened when a person forced you to feel their love.

I believed that was love and since they say “Seeing is believing”, I had to remove it from my sight.

9 minutes to remove what took less than 60 seconds and lasted nearly 12 years.

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